California or bust.

The countdown has begun. 18 days until I see blue skies and my toes begin to thaw out. If it weren't for my trip out west I think my whining would turn into the full on ugly cry.

Who am I kidding? I cried myself to sleep under my two down comforters last night and I awoke crying as I layered my fifth piece of clothing over my broken nose. (later post)

Blizzard is the buzz word for the evening and school kids are crossing their fingers in hopes of shutting off their alarm in the morning.

I just hope I can get out of my driveway.

i love cousin nite.

My sisters think I'm nuts. I'm just crazy for my nieces and nephews. And they love each other.
It's fun to be a part of it...






...apparently the ghost in my home has a blast too when it tore down my family room curtains.

...'tis the season...

Delsie was included in the $15 drawing with the cousins. She loved her red lobster the most.



Christmas at my parents. Adults had to purchase a $5 gift from a second hand store- it was a complete succes. The gifts were amazing and it was a blast to see how far we could stretch a dollar.


So blessed with Gods faithfulness. It was a Merry Christmas.

the story continues.

****read the previous post that I wrote the day before this story happened...***


It is not uncommon for me to hear every dog story. I love dogs. I live life with a dog by my side 24/7. Saturday morning at was at the local coffee shop, JP's, having a coffee and bagel with a friend when a person approached our table and proceeded to tell me that there was a black lab that followed her this morning outside the city pool. I tried to respond with compassion but wondered why she felt the need to tell me.
That is until I left JP's to meet my friend at her store down town 8th street.
I decided to "walk" to her store to cherish the weather before Antarctica air hit and covered the streets with snow and ice.
When I approached the corner of 8th and River and waited for the pedestrian light to give the go ahead I noticed Delsies ears alerting me to something. I followed her gaze and realized a beautiful black lab was slowly galloping toward us to offer a friendly hello. She was spared by the halting of the tires of the cars that almost hit her and allured to the sound of my voice calling her to safety. Once the girl in the wheelchair kicked in to rescue this dog, the eight other on lookers
decided they better ask the disabled girl if she needed some help. Never mind that this beautiful puppy almost got hit!
After I convinced a sweet Hope College student that you could rig up a leash to be used as a collar, we made our way to my friends store. The plan was to give myself some time to think and get this four legged friend out of the cold and away from danger.
Our plan to go Goodwill shopping changed as we drove out to the Humane society to see if a frantic owner had called. After searching the books to come up void, the workers gave her the necessary shots and cleaned her ears so Delsie wouldn't get sick, we returned home.
It wasn't very long before this dog and I bonded.
No accidents in the house, no barking and Delsie even seemed to tolerate her.
This dog was attached to me and I to it. She slept in my bed and made me laugh. I stayed home from church and walked the dogs three times. It was a bit crazy the first time but by our third walk, we had it down pat. We were all a team.
Monday came and I had to go to work. I was a bit sad as I was occupied by her this weekend and so very grateful for the distraction and simple joy she brought to my home.
I returned home for lunch to let her out and received a phone call from "Sarah" telling me the humane society gave her my number and I would give them a lot of happiness if I had their dog. Little did she know the happiness her dog gave me this past weekend.
I tried to reassure her that their dog was safe and happy. We exchanged stories of how the lost and then found happened. I described the dogs silly antics and the similarities in the looks she has with my dog. We then arranged for me to drop off the dog on my way back to work. She was thrilled, I was a tad disappointed.
Before we hung up, I asked her the dogs name.
"Nugget." she replied.

Of course.
Nugget.

dog days.

When tears stream faster than the sound of laughter and time is both my enemy and friend these days...I attempt to focus on "nuggets" of Gods faithfulness and love for me.
It's so simple in the moment. All I need to do is turn my head to the right and follow the sound of Delsie snoring as she enters REM on her toddler bed for the evening. I can not imagine my life with out her. If she weren't a part of me, I don't think I would get out of my queen size bed.
Yea, my gift of Gods promise for my life is in a dog. Some would find this strange, maybe a bit over the top...but I just see Delsie as pure joy; my nugget.

smelling the flowers.

We all have a story. Each chapter has a plot; sometimes it's mystery, a drama, a comedy, a thriller and hopefully not a murder. Stories can be a quick read, simple yet entertaining. or they can be quite detailed and rather boring. Some characters create chaos and long for complexity. Other people live for tranquility and hope for serenity. Whatever our life story, it is real to us and alive. The words created on a page are not just words formed out of the alphabet, they have meaning. They have purpose. They create who we are. How our character develops; how our story develops. How the story is told. The readers will listen from their perspective. And we will learn from each and every chapter. Hopefully.

"Just keep on writing even if all you can write is 'life stinks'". I like this quote. Because as I stare at the blank page, I am so scared of the words being formed. So I don't write. I don't move. I am frozen with fear. I become stagnant. I get stuck. If I form the words "Life Stinks", I take a away the power. The power I feel is stripping me of who I am. Making me sad. Allowing my heart to hurt.

So I persevere. I smell the flowers dropped off on my desk at work. I sip coffee with company who loves me. I answer the phone from a caller who asks me how I am doing. I repeat the words, "I love you" a little more and receive the same words back. I force a smile. I let the tears flow. I allow laughter to fill space and float in the silent air. I gaze upon a wall art that reminds
me that God is present. I cling to the prayers being offered. I am in community. A family. I belong.

My story is not finished. This chapter is done. Maybe. Or maybe it is just beginning. The pain is intense. As I lean into it, I cry out for my voice to be heard. Is he listening? But more importantly, am I? It's my story.

cousins halloween party

I've never got into Halloween but it's fun to see my family into it...